My Journey.

I find this definition fundamentally misguiding since it suggests we can (and should) measure our success against an ideal that exists outside of ourselves—one that has been set by others or even society at large. It also assumes there is an “end goal” or “final state”—one we can (and should) reach for—which invites linear, narrowed thinking in a way that simply does not harmonize with, nor support, the natural flow of life and our evolution as human beings. Even if there is a directional, forward-moving nature to everything we might plan, give our energy to, or strive for, there are many inevitable twists and turns along the way that will require us to adapt while also remaining open to different possibilities or versions of success.

So what is the real answer? I have come to realize that in the end, we all have the freedom to determine and decide what success means and looks like for ourselves across every aspect of our lives—now, and at every future turn. This allows us to ground our definition for success in our personal desires, values, and realities while simultaneously maintaining an openness and inherent curiosity about what might be possible. The best part? We can adapt our definition—and approach—along the way. After living into this definition and approach, I’m now flowing with the currents of life (and work) much more easily.

Along those lines, I believe the truest form of success is about choosing how I respond to everything, and that the meaning we assign to things is relative and matters greatly. This notion is articulated beautifully by the late Viktor Frankl, a holocaust survivor that has no doubt suffered in unimaginable ways: “Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms—to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one's own way”. Powerful, isn’t it?

As for the experiences and events that have shaped who I am, here’s a quick summary. I was born and raised in rural Germany on a horse farm. At age 15, my family relocated to the US in response to a cascade of difficult family circumstances. What followed was a challenging and often painful process of grappling of feeling uprooted, deep loss, and the fracturing of my family and support system along the way. Though I developed coping mechanisms that “got me through” to adulthood, the house of cards eventually came crashing down and I realized I had been in pure survival mode my entire young life, relying only on my work ethic, my intellect, and a very finite energy store to push on.

Although I arguably built an incredible career and a great deal of “success” by my early 30s, collecting a diverse set of educational and career experiences and a great deal of professional maturity along the way, nothing could have prepared me for complete burnout. I was done (stick a fork in me done), and I felt utterly lost and directionless. So I gave notice and transitioned the start-up I had been running after escaping corporate America with only one objective: to heal, and to start again in a way that felt much more aligned. It was an important step in service of honoring and sharing my gifts with the world in a way that actually mattered—not just to me, but to everyone and everything around me.

Having been introduced to meditation and self-inquiry as a small child was a priceless gift during this time. Combined with the choice to go on a 2-month cross-country wilderness journey with only my dog, my car, my bike, and my tent, it provided the space, nourishment, and salve for the soul I needed to reimagine a path forward. A former financial services executive who was once swiftly climbing the ladder, I have since worked as a barista (one of my favorite jobs ever!), a low-woman on the totem pole at a health tech start-up (ironically, the worst employment experience of my life). The winding road has since led me to what some might call a dream role at a small yet mighty leadership and team effectiveness consulting firm where I get to invest a portion of my life’s energy into building and delivering something that lifts others every day.

The end? Not so fast. Through all of my experiences, and in reflecting on the state of the world, another reality has come into focus for me: The world needs more women running the show, and it needs more courageous leaders who are aligned with and working to enable what truly matters. As a result, my work as a growth and mindset coach is aimed at enabling primarily women who are ready for what is next in service of their own happiness and joy, and the health of our communities and world.

Will you join me on this journey?